by Sara Jackson, CSW
Primary Children’s Center for Safe & Healthy Families
Recent studies have shown that people who express gratitude actually become happier by doing so. A study in the Journal of Research in Personality (2007) found that over time, gratitude is associated with lower levels of stress and depression and higher levels of social support. Additional studies have shown that expressing gratitude enhances pro-social as well as moral behavior. Those who are more grateful may actually see their environments as more benevolent and make it so by helping others.
Learning to express gratitude in our adult lives is somewhat simple: we can integrate the act of gratitude into our daily lives by writing down what we are grateful for or sharing it with our families each night. But how can we teach our children to learn gratitude? Here are some simple suggestions for how to integrate gratitude into our children’s lives:
- Have children draw or write thank you notes for every gift received (It teaches them to appreciate what they receive and that they will make someone else happy by receiving their art/note)
- Work gratitude into everyday conversations (try modeling gratitude for your children by frequently stating what you are grateful for or things that you appreciate. This will help reinforce the idea of gratitude)
- Assign household chores such as feeding the dog or stacking dishes (by having your children help around the house, they realize that things that you do on a daily basis take effort and they will appreciate your efforts more; Be sure to thank your children for doing the chore)
- Encourage generosity (Donate gently used toys/clothes with your children or bake a cake for a sick neighbor; kids will usually be excited to have the opportunity to help others—especially if you talk about how grateful the recipient will be for their generosity)
- Practice saying no to your kids (Kids frequently ask for toys, candy, more TV time, etc. If you say yes every time, it will be difficult for them to feel grateful for the small things. Saying no makes the times you say yes so much sweeter)
- Schedule gratitude into your daily routine (Go around the dinner table and have everyone say one thing they are grateful for or appreciated that day or encourage nightly prayers)
By modeling gratitude for your children and encouraging them to incorporate it into their daily lives, you are promoting gratefulness, pro-social and moral behavior. In addition, studies show that those who express gratitude are actually happier! So, why not foster happy, benevolent children who aim to make a difference in others’ lives?
