By Marilyn Morris
Child Advocacy Specialist

Here we are in the middle of another holiday season and that means more time spent in the car. Whether it is a trip to Grandma’s, or just running the hundreds of errands around town, driving can be stressful – and dangerous if you are traveling with your very own escape artist.

You might relate to this situation: You are driving on the freeway, thinking of your long list of “to dos” wondering how you are ever going to get everything done, when suddenly your hair is yanked hard, bringing tears to your eyes. As you desperately try to find a place to pull over, you realize that once again, darling little Harry has escaped his car seat and is gleefully bouncing around the van unbuckling every child in the car. Sound familiar?

“Help my child won’t stay buckled!” is one of the most common concerns we hear from parents. The reasons for unbuckling can range from delight in a new skill, boredom, or wanting mom’s attention to more serious issues such as behavioral or developmental delays. So what do you do?

Here are some suggestions from our Child Passenger Safety experts at Primary Children’s Medical Center. Maybe one will work for you. *Remember, while using Duct Tape is tempting, it is never a recommended solution. Duct Taped on mittens, however, is ok.

• ŽAlways wear your seat belt! This is the most important of all. Make sure every person in the car is always buckled. Make sure others transporting Harry insist on everyone being buckled in their cars, too. Children need consistency and want to be just like those they love and admire.

• ŽMake sure your child is sitting in a car seat that fits. If Harry is crammed into a seat that is too small, it is not going to be comfortable and he will try to get out. Wouldn’t you? But, if the seat is too big or the straps too loose, a child can easily wiggle out. Make sure straps are snug but not cutting off circulation and the buckle is not pinching (Ouch). Sometimes trying a different seat helps because the chest clip is harder to open or push down. A child with special needs may need some positioning aids to help make the seat more comfortable. Rolled blankets on the child’s sides can add support. If Harry is escaping from a booster seat, maybe you need to put him back in a harnessed seat that goes to a higher weight limit. A new seat on the market is the Kiddy World Plus. This seat installs as easily as a booster, yet its design helps it to be escape proof. This seat is not cheap, but may be worth the expense.

• ŽInclude Breaks. Have you been traveling for a long time? Maybe Harry just needs a break. On one long trip we stopped at an empty church parking lot and let my grandson run around for 20 minutes. He got back in his car seat, we continued on our way and he promptly fell asleep for the remainder of the trip.

• Make your child the “Car Seat /Seat Belt Police” Some children thrive on being the boss, especially if they can tell other siblings what to do. By being in charge of the “everybody’s buckled” rule, Harry may take staying buckled himself more seriously.

• ŽProvide distractions. Make sure the buckle or chest clip is not the most interesting thing at hand for a bored child. As a parent in the 70’s with no air conditioning, I often thought the pioneers were on to something by having their hot, bored children get out of the wagon and walk. Today you have so many options for entertaining children, from in-vehicle DVD players to portable devices or even travel books and toys. You can also sing songs, play ABC games, or guessing games to keep kids entertained.

• ŽTurn Off. Threatening to pull over or “the car doesn’t start until everyone is buckled” sounds great in theory, but seriously, this only works if you are going someplace Harry wants to go - like Disneyland. Using this as a tactic just gives Harry a free “Get Out of Going on Mom’s Boring Errands” card. However, you can turn off favorite music, DVD’s, chit chat and other activities Harry enjoys if that motivates him to stay buckled.

• Ž Provide Praise. If Harry is unbuckling because he loves your reaction, stop reinforcing him. Praise Harry for when he is staying buckled and ignore the bad behavior. Just pull over, re-buckle Harry, then go home or continue on your way without giving him a pay-off for misbehaving. Afterwards give yourself a big reward for not completely losing in on the side of the road after the zillionth time you do this.

• ŽProvide a Reward. (OK, bribe) You can reward Harry for staying bucked with small candies, fruit or stickers, or use a point system so he can earn a special treat at the store. Something that motivates your child but is no big deal to you works best. For a really determined Houdini, you may need to start out rewarding his good behavior every minute then gradually building up time.

• Ž Provide a Companion. If you have room, install an old car seat next to Harry and have him buckle in a favorite stuffed animal or doll. If he is checking to make sure “Fluffy” is safe, he may be less likely to unbuckle himself.

• Ž Have a Parent or older sibling as a seat mate. Most often adults sit up front but if you have another adult riding with you, have him/her sit next to Harry. Grandmas are especially good seat mates. Or you can have an older child monitor and distract Harry. The seat mate could also hand out small rewards to Harry for staying buckled.

• Ž Use Consequences. You will need to enlist the help of the other kids and a babysitter, but when Harry learns he doesn’t get to go with the family to a fun activity because of safety concerns when traveling, he may get the message. It works this way: You start driving to an activity, if Harry unbuckles, you turn around and go home. No second chances. Harry stays with the babysitter, and the rest of the family goes to the activity. Of course, the one time you have this all arranged will be the one time Harry doesn’t unbuckle his car seat. Life works that way sometimes.

• ŽGet some professional help. A child with a developmental or behavioral disorder will likely need more than simple reinforcement or distraction techniques. You can talk to a therapist to get ideas on how to develop a behavior plan. The therapist can help you learn how to consistently use the plan to reinforce and increase the desired behavior.

• ŽUse special needs car seats and restraints. There are many products designed to help with the positioning and support for children with special needs. These seats have harness systems with higher weights limits and other features that can help keep a child restrained. These seats are not cheap, but your insurance or Medicaid may help when the seat is deemed medically necessary. One company-EZ On Products makes a vest with a zipper in the back that restrains a child without using a seat belt at all. http://www.ezonpro.com/products.shtml.

• Ž Warning about using Escape Proof Products. There are products on the market designed to help with this issue. An alarm that sounds when a child unbuckles can alert you to a danger, but other items such as buckle guards and chest clip covers are considered “non-regulated” products by car seat manufacturers and are usually discouraged. They may help contain your child, but you need to talk to a car seat technician to learn about the possible risks involved with using them. Also, you should never adapt or modify your car seat in an attempt to keep your child restrained.

The Car Seat Technicians at Primary Children’s Medical Center are happy to talk you to help resolve your transportation concerns and issues. We are available from 9 am – 4 pm, Monday - Friday. 801-662-CARS (2277) or 801-662-6583

Marilyn has a degree in Psychology and English. She has been working at Primary Children’s for 12 years and has been a certified Child Passenger Safety Technician for 6 yrs. She is also a certified instructor for Transporting Children with Special Health Care Needs. She has 3 children and 6 grandchildren and is passionate about helping keep kids safe. Marilyn loves to travel, read, and is a family history addict.